School Set on Fire in the Back Alley
Some time ago, we reported that Floxod Aridia Vloress had plans to set up a school in the Back Alley. The project began, was well-underway, and all was going smoothly until terrorists targeted the school. Unfortunately, before the school was even able to be opened, the Menxhruian terrorists set fire to the building, and it burned to the ground.
However, with steadfast determination, Floxod Vloress is already rebuilding, and plans to have the school running as early as the end of this month! Like a phoenix from the ashes, the school will rise, and education triumph. Though, not in the Back Alley. The school has been relocated to the west of the Iron Gate District. No Fawkes given for the Back Alley.
Coal Killer Brought to Justice
Citizens can rest easier. The so called “Coal Killer” has been apprehended and justice has been carried out. She was a somewhat wealthy woman who went by the name of Caelian. Sergeant Kothliim was the one to capture her and bring her in after finding evidence of who she was while having breakfast at the King’s Inn. The poor man can't even eat breakfast in peace. Witnesses say that she tried to stab him and escape when he discovered who she was. Her knife must have missed the mark because the valiant guard was able to thwart her escape by throwing a table and knocking her unconscious. After quite a scene, she was brought to the guardhouse for a trial.
The trial was presided over by the Honorable Senkessa ul-Alaford Silak. A pretty straight forward case, Caelian was found guilty of seven counts of murder, as well as the attempted murder of the then Corporal Kothliim. She neither denied killing the men, not showed any sort of remorse. Due to his diligent work, he has since been promoted to Sergeant. The Coal Killer was sentenced to death.
As for the actual event of the execution, there were two interesting things to note. The first is that the Coal Killer was missing a hand. Though we are sure that it’s entirely unrelated, Sergeant Kothliim was seen exiting the guard house carrying a severed hand. The second interesting thing is the means of execution. Witnesses say that Molbraag the Executioner severed the coal killer’s head using a handsaw. It is unclear whether the means of the execution was his own plan or that from a higher authority. Either way, it’s sure to turn some heads. It turned one, at any rate.
We should all take a moment to remember the names of these seven people (who were definitely all men):
Lisa ul-Aleroth Silius, Aleroth ul-Brarith Ruxrod, Rireinth ul-Donem Dadire, Orylus ul-Mesenth Nixuthek, Sefuzessa ul-Warduith Sallzodire, Alfim ul-Maccarith Pinossod, and Nesileynxa ul-Hastarn Quarnytire.
May they rest in peace now that their murderer has been brought to justice.
Origins of our Sithire EXPOSED?
Exactly what is our dear Sithire? It started as whispers among a quiet minority, but the speculation is slowly spreading. Some citizens have suggested that her grace, Sithire Isabelle Auxerre is some sort of sentient shape-shifting string of wagons from beyond the stars. No one knows exactly where she (or they) would get their power from, but it wouldn’t be unreasonable to assume she acquired it from the sun. This would explain how an alchemy incident would have made her unable to be in direct sunlight. Perhaps the experiment she was conducting at the time had to do with trying to siphon more power from the sun, and it ended up working too well. Thus, creating the need to cover up, so as not to absorb too much power and burn up. Or, perhaps that accident was the source of how she came to be trapped in her current form.
Watch for up to date information on the matter in future editions of the Rumor Mill!
There are giants in the sky!
There are big, tall ter...The citizens should be aware that there are reports that the Sky Keep of Storm giants has been observed on the Northern-Eastern border of Transdariana. The last time they visited the area, the conducted a series of raids, so all should be on the alert. Please report any sightings or incidence to the correct authorities.
Fell-Hounds Roaming the Countryside
Citizens be warned, The Alchemist, Lord Anatole Horasym has been found dead, and his monstrous modified wolf experiments roam free. And in a sad, yet foreseeable turn of fate, it was these same alchemical experiments that did him in. Turning on their creator, they apparently mauled him to death before escaping. Now, they roam the countryside, looking for people and animals a like to tear apart. It has been advised to only travel in numbers, as well as with an armed escort. There were seven total fell-hounds that escaped, though one of them has been taken care of by adventurers, so there are only 6 remaining.
Should anyone wish to aid the effort to eradicate these creatures, there is a bounty offered by the government of 5,000 crowns.
Obasi, the one who was responsible for the ghoul infestation has been taken out! Once it was found out where Obasi dwelt, Floxod Uzzo led a band of brave adventurers to take him out. The group of adventurers included Octavia, Mirzoryan, Varizibunderogakindr (Do not ask us how to pronounce that), Liirune, Aximiam, Malisha Redlain, and of course, Floxod Uzzo himself. We heard tales that taking Obasi out was not an easy task! On what we are sure is the behalf of all of Drache, we want to thank this courageous group of people. Drache is a safer place because of your hard work.
Gudrun and Uzzo Merge...Er, Marriage
It happened. Sources tell us that about a month and a half ago, Floxod Uzzo Salksilek of Wauzen, Steward of Goat Island, member of the Drachean Council married the strangely large-eyed woman, Tespin Gudrun. True to the tone of the ooze himself (as well as his new wife, actually) Tespin Gudrun, little fanfare surrounded the marriage. They didn’t hold any large public ceremony or festivities despite the status of the ooze. But, dear readers, we know you care little for the boring details like what she wore on her wedding day, so we didn't bother to find out. What she wore that night is much more interesting! Unfortunately, we don't know any details about that either.
But, of course, this brings us to certain questions. Will there be oozlings soon? Can oozes actually make children with other people, or can they only reproduce asexually? What would a half ooze even look like? At any rate, hopefully it will make the Floxod’s life a little less lackluster to take the bald-headed gnome for a stroll in the misty forest.
Civic Guard Bounties
There are a couple active bounties put out by the Civic Guard.
Iyben the Menxrukian is wanted for attempted terrorism, among other crimes. The reward for his capture is 1500 crowns
A reward of 5000 crowns has been placed on the goblin, Irk Elfshanker. He is wanted for murder and attempted murder.
Join the Fight League Today!
Arena Fight League is looking for more fighters. Sign up of 25 rixlte and you will sign a contract. All fights are currently unarmed. Purse is currently 125 rixtle for winner. Previous experience as professional fighter not needed but fight experience would be desirable. See Aridia Vloress at the King's Inn for more information. Sponsors also sought for sponsoring fights and fighters
Cody vs Ailara 17.I.488 winner : Cody (125 rixtle purse)
Ailara vs Sul 20.I.488 winner : Ailara (125 rixtle purse)
Kartan vs Ailara 14.II.488 winner : Kartan (125 rixtle purse)
Kartan vs Cody 21.II.488 winner : Kartan (125 rixtle purse)
Cody vs Ailara 28.II.488 winner : Ailara (125 rixtle purse)
Random-Ass Building in the Back Alley Blows Up
Not much different than any other day in the back Alley, there was an explosion. Some building blew up.